3 posts in a row is it? I think I should get some sort of reward? A reward for consistency ;) j/k I think I'm speaking too soon to be honest haha.
I want to thank those who are reading my posts though. I know they are VERY long, but sometimes I can't stop. But I will try to make them shorter. It's encouraging to see that people care to listen. So thank yoooooou, yes you :)
So, I think I've hit a point where I'm just worn out you know? From this whole job hunting thing. I know most, if not all, have been through this at one point in their lives. But for those who know me, I'm pretty intense when it comes to working for what I want. One of my classmates recently told me that her first impression of me when she saw me at Parsons was that I was feisty. haha
Well, so I've been working quite hard trying to get a job you know? But I feel so helpless like a hamster on a hamster wheel. It's very discouraging and a hit to the ego. My patience is being tested on so many levels as well. Anyway, weeks of this is just too tiring, especially at my intensity.
SO, I'm excited for tomorrow because I decided to not do anything. Yea, nothing!
No resume, no cover letter, no mediabistro, creativehotlist! None of it!
And instead...go on a date with Sandybeaches. Have brunch and go to MoMA.
You have no idea how excited I am for this haha. It's been awhile since I could wake up and have somewhere to go, albeit it's not a job. But feeling like you are needed somewhere feels good (not saying that Sandy needs me, but you get the point). So thanks Sandy for the date to come <3
And happy 25th!! I pray this 25th year will be filled with so many blessings, including an awesome, fulfilling career, incredible spiritual growth, and an amazing man, just for you :) And hopefully, you'll stay here in NYC.
That's it for now :)
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
What really matters.
Relationships are hard. And that's an understatement.
It's hard to find people we click with, people we trust, people we understand, people we share similar values and vision with, people we agree with, people we find attractive, people we can relate to, people we like. You can search this whole world, if you had the time and money that is, and I bet that you wouldn't find many.
No wonder people try to search for friends by any means, like on TV like Paris Hilton or Brody Jenner. j/k. Well that's what they say. Who knows. (I am a victim of Bromance. There. I said it. I have many guilty mtv pleasures).
Why do you think that is? Why do you think God made us all so different and so unique? To challenge us perhaps? It only makes sense that it's because He wants us to learn so many things, shape us to be round dynamic characters, sharpen us to be wise, experienced, and to prepare us to be mature enough to meet with Him one day. To ultimately have a close relationship with Him?
We're so distant from Him. So far. So sinful. Sometimes I feel like I'll never get there. Never be able to touch His hands and see Him. And it's scary. But I find myself persevering, pressing on, hoping to one day, just one day meet this friend, this best friend, this father, this teacher, this lover that my soul has longed for ever since I was born.
So where am I going with all this about friendship and relationship? I think I'm learning that I need to do something that's two-fold. One, I need to be ready to open up to those I least expect to be my friends, those I don't click with, those I can't relate with, those I don't like even and invite them into my life. You know that verse in the bible, when they say even pagans are good to those they like?
"If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." (Matthew 5:46-48)
We ALL have something to offer, something to teach one another through our unique life experiences, no matter how old, what religion, what background. It's our responsibility to discern what that is, and to reveal this and teach this to one another. To better our characters. To grow.
SO PLEASE, spread your wisdom y'all, share your experiences, how you grew from trials. I believe we're not suppose to all go through the same things, if we have one another to learn from. We can learn from others' mistakes. And blessed are those who do. I know I wasn't one. I was one of those, I have to go through it myself type of person. Sigh.
And the second part I am learning is to not expect people to be a certain way, either like you, or like your friends, or whoever you like and respect. Because everyone's different right? Different for a divine reason.
You can wait all day, all your lifetime even, for that person who you envision to be "the one," but I think you'll be waiting a long time, if not forever. I don't think it happens, quite rare if it actually does, I don't know, if we end up with someone who we envisioned or expected. How great would that be? haha
Funny thing is that's what I've been doing. Still doing. Expecting this perfect guy. Perfect looks, perfect personality, perfect humor, perfect job, perfect family, perfect love for me, perfect faith. Perfect in my own standards that is, so it's certain things I'm looking for. To make it worse, those certain standards are relative to someone I once knew and loved. But there was only one of him. And that was that. I took what I could from it, so did he. We learned what we could through each other, and now it's time to let go and move on.
My friend sent me this clip on youtube (Tyler Perry's Madea) to cheer me up and it's funny but a lot of I find to be true. If you want to watch it, go check it out at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF_10F7eYRE
In it it says that some people come for a lifetime, and some for a season. And you have to know which is which. And you'll always mess up if you mix seasonal people up with lifetime expectations. They're suppose to teach you one thing and leave. People don't know this and fall in love and then wonder why they have no peace.
I like this part, I'll try to quote it for those who won't watch it:
"I put everyone who comes into my life into a category of a tree.
Some people are like leaves on a tree. The wind blows, they fly over there. They're unstable. The season changes, they weather and die. And that's ok. Most people are like this. They're just there to take from the tree, to take and give shade every now and then. It's all they can do.
Some people are like a branch on a tree. You have to be careful with a branch, because they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and really strong, but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry.
But if you find two or three people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of the tree, you are blessed because those are the type of people who are going nowhere. A tree can have a hundred million branches but only a few roots down at the bottom is what you need to make sure it gets what it needs. When you get your roots, hold onto them, but the rest of them, let it go. LET THEM GO."
Oh gosh. Letting go. That's a topic in and of itself for another blog that I won't get into it now. But going back to expecting things from people who are already in your life or who will come into your life is just nonsense I am beginning to learn. And going back to what I look for in guys. Nonsense again. I think slowly God is showing me what really matters. In all areas of my life. When we start to focus on all the itty bitty things, we miss the big picture. And I think He's trying to tell me that what I think I want, is not what I need. But what I need and what matters is someone who will love me more than anyone else can on this earth. That's what matters most. Someone who can love me the right way, the way I need and deserve to be loved.
And going along the same lines of what I wrote yesterday, don't assume that you know yourself 100%. There are so many things you have yet to learn about who you are and what matters to you. Like my friend put it, don't box yourself. And in that way, I don't want to box myself in thinking I am only compatible with certain types of people--friends or more. That I will only be happy with this certain career or this certain guy. What do I know really? Everyday is a learning experience of who I am. And I can only pray that God will graciously reveal it to me because I know He knows who I am, what I need, and what brings me joy.
And so I end with a song. See a pattern? ;)
Till the day I see you, I want to grow to prepare for this union.
For the relationship that matters most.
I Can Only Imagine
MercyMe
http://www.ilike.com/artist/MercyMe/track/I+Can+Only+Imagine
I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side
I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Son
I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever, forever worship You
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever, forever worship you
I can only imagine
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21
It's hard to find people we click with, people we trust, people we understand, people we share similar values and vision with, people we agree with, people we find attractive, people we can relate to, people we like. You can search this whole world, if you had the time and money that is, and I bet that you wouldn't find many.
No wonder people try to search for friends by any means, like on TV like Paris Hilton or Brody Jenner. j/k. Well that's what they say. Who knows. (I am a victim of Bromance. There. I said it. I have many guilty mtv pleasures).
Why do you think that is? Why do you think God made us all so different and so unique? To challenge us perhaps? It only makes sense that it's because He wants us to learn so many things, shape us to be round dynamic characters, sharpen us to be wise, experienced, and to prepare us to be mature enough to meet with Him one day. To ultimately have a close relationship with Him?
We're so distant from Him. So far. So sinful. Sometimes I feel like I'll never get there. Never be able to touch His hands and see Him. And it's scary. But I find myself persevering, pressing on, hoping to one day, just one day meet this friend, this best friend, this father, this teacher, this lover that my soul has longed for ever since I was born.
So where am I going with all this about friendship and relationship? I think I'm learning that I need to do something that's two-fold. One, I need to be ready to open up to those I least expect to be my friends, those I don't click with, those I can't relate with, those I don't like even and invite them into my life. You know that verse in the bible, when they say even pagans are good to those they like?
"If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." (Matthew 5:46-48)
We ALL have something to offer, something to teach one another through our unique life experiences, no matter how old, what religion, what background. It's our responsibility to discern what that is, and to reveal this and teach this to one another. To better our characters. To grow.
SO PLEASE, spread your wisdom y'all, share your experiences, how you grew from trials. I believe we're not suppose to all go through the same things, if we have one another to learn from. We can learn from others' mistakes. And blessed are those who do. I know I wasn't one. I was one of those, I have to go through it myself type of person. Sigh.
And the second part I am learning is to not expect people to be a certain way, either like you, or like your friends, or whoever you like and respect. Because everyone's different right? Different for a divine reason.
You can wait all day, all your lifetime even, for that person who you envision to be "the one," but I think you'll be waiting a long time, if not forever. I don't think it happens, quite rare if it actually does, I don't know, if we end up with someone who we envisioned or expected. How great would that be? haha
Funny thing is that's what I've been doing. Still doing. Expecting this perfect guy. Perfect looks, perfect personality, perfect humor, perfect job, perfect family, perfect love for me, perfect faith. Perfect in my own standards that is, so it's certain things I'm looking for. To make it worse, those certain standards are relative to someone I once knew and loved. But there was only one of him. And that was that. I took what I could from it, so did he. We learned what we could through each other, and now it's time to let go and move on.
My friend sent me this clip on youtube (Tyler Perry's Madea) to cheer me up and it's funny but a lot of I find to be true. If you want to watch it, go check it out at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF_10F7eYRE
In it it says that some people come for a lifetime, and some for a season. And you have to know which is which. And you'll always mess up if you mix seasonal people up with lifetime expectations. They're suppose to teach you one thing and leave. People don't know this and fall in love and then wonder why they have no peace.
I like this part, I'll try to quote it for those who won't watch it:
"I put everyone who comes into my life into a category of a tree.
Some people are like leaves on a tree. The wind blows, they fly over there. They're unstable. The season changes, they weather and die. And that's ok. Most people are like this. They're just there to take from the tree, to take and give shade every now and then. It's all they can do.
Some people are like a branch on a tree. You have to be careful with a branch, because they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and really strong, but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry.
But if you find two or three people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of the tree, you are blessed because those are the type of people who are going nowhere. A tree can have a hundred million branches but only a few roots down at the bottom is what you need to make sure it gets what it needs. When you get your roots, hold onto them, but the rest of them, let it go. LET THEM GO."
Oh gosh. Letting go. That's a topic in and of itself for another blog that I won't get into it now. But going back to expecting things from people who are already in your life or who will come into your life is just nonsense I am beginning to learn. And going back to what I look for in guys. Nonsense again. I think slowly God is showing me what really matters. In all areas of my life. When we start to focus on all the itty bitty things, we miss the big picture. And I think He's trying to tell me that what I think I want, is not what I need. But what I need and what matters is someone who will love me more than anyone else can on this earth. That's what matters most. Someone who can love me the right way, the way I need and deserve to be loved.
And going along the same lines of what I wrote yesterday, don't assume that you know yourself 100%. There are so many things you have yet to learn about who you are and what matters to you. Like my friend put it, don't box yourself. And in that way, I don't want to box myself in thinking I am only compatible with certain types of people--friends or more. That I will only be happy with this certain career or this certain guy. What do I know really? Everyday is a learning experience of who I am. And I can only pray that God will graciously reveal it to me because I know He knows who I am, what I need, and what brings me joy.
And so I end with a song. See a pattern? ;)
Till the day I see you, I want to grow to prepare for this union.
For the relationship that matters most.
I Can Only Imagine
MercyMe
http://www.ilike.com/artist/MercyMe/track/I+Can+Only+Imagine
I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side
I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Son
I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever, forever worship You
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever, forever worship you
I can only imagine
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21
Nothing can separate His love for us.
Every day is full of surprises. Whether it's surprises about who others are, or who you are. And this mystery in not knowing what could happen today or tomorrow is something I am in awe of and quite frankly, scared of.
I've learned something this past weekend. To never be so sure and full of yourself. To humble yourself in knowing that YOU ARE HUMAN. Christian, Atheist, Gay, Straight, you're no better than anyone else. Why? Because we are all human and we ALL fall short of the Lord and we need His saving grace more than we can even fathom. And so I see how much of God I need daily. How helpless I am without him. How any good in me is because of Him.
Now, I'm not going to go into detail and I apologize for being vague to those who are reading this because more than being worried of being judged, I don't think it's necessary. But I will say this. I will take the most out of any situation because of one reason and that reason alone. I know that whatever I do or did, whatever mess I'm in, He loves me through all of it. And NOTHING, absolutely nothing will take that away from me.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
I thought it was getting better, but I guess I was just throwing everything under a rug. Surpressing my hurt. I didn't give enough time to say, "I hate you for hurting me so much" and "Enough is enough. 5 years is enough for you to take hold of my heart. It's time to give it to God 100% because He is the only one who deserves it" and "It's time I love the Lord my God with all my heart and quite frankly, love myself."
My friend said that we're all human, so we're always a work in progress. So, really all we can ask for is to learn and grow from it. So, it's up to me to take what I need to from any situation, no matter how big, how discouraging, how unbelievable, and learn from it. I couldn't agree more.
Lord, you truly are the only healer in this world. Without your amazing grace and love, I wouldn't have the strength to love myself or others. And I can't imagine a world without love. You teach me through anything, through my biggest mistakes even, how much you love me. Who does that? Only you. Even though I break your heart continually, you give me strength, you wash away my fears and hopelessness, you not only love me the same, you seek after me to show me this, even though I don't deserve it at all...
Thank you.
I love you.
I want to love you more.
Help me Lord to love you the way you love me.
And help me to love me the way you love me.
He knows my name
By Geoff Moore
I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in His hands
I have a Father
He calls me His own
He’ll never leave me
No matter where I go
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And hears me when I call
I've learned something this past weekend. To never be so sure and full of yourself. To humble yourself in knowing that YOU ARE HUMAN. Christian, Atheist, Gay, Straight, you're no better than anyone else. Why? Because we are all human and we ALL fall short of the Lord and we need His saving grace more than we can even fathom. And so I see how much of God I need daily. How helpless I am without him. How any good in me is because of Him.
Now, I'm not going to go into detail and I apologize for being vague to those who are reading this because more than being worried of being judged, I don't think it's necessary. But I will say this. I will take the most out of any situation because of one reason and that reason alone. I know that whatever I do or did, whatever mess I'm in, He loves me through all of it. And NOTHING, absolutely nothing will take that away from me.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
"For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Romans 8:28-39
I also learned how hurt I still was because of someone who's taken a great hold of my life. A good thing about trial, is that it gives light to what's really going on in our hearts. I guess that's why some people call it a "moment of truth." We're able to see our first reaction, our first thoughts, where our heart is at. And sure enough, one of mine was in the exact same place, with that friend from my past. Thinking first about what he would think. Ridiculously using him as a scapegoat for why I am even in this current trial to begin with. How the root of all this is because I felt so unloved, abandoned and hurt by him. But that isn't what God is trying to show me through this. That isn't even the truth. He's showing me that I'm still not depending on Him to provide me with affection, love and self-worth.I thought it was getting better, but I guess I was just throwing everything under a rug. Surpressing my hurt. I didn't give enough time to say, "I hate you for hurting me so much" and "Enough is enough. 5 years is enough for you to take hold of my heart. It's time to give it to God 100% because He is the only one who deserves it" and "It's time I love the Lord my God with all my heart and quite frankly, love myself."
My friend said that we're all human, so we're always a work in progress. So, really all we can ask for is to learn and grow from it. So, it's up to me to take what I need to from any situation, no matter how big, how discouraging, how unbelievable, and learn from it. I couldn't agree more.
Lord, you truly are the only healer in this world. Without your amazing grace and love, I wouldn't have the strength to love myself or others. And I can't imagine a world without love. You teach me through anything, through my biggest mistakes even, how much you love me. Who does that? Only you. Even though I break your heart continually, you give me strength, you wash away my fears and hopelessness, you not only love me the same, you seek after me to show me this, even though I don't deserve it at all...
Thank you.
I love you.
I want to love you more.
Help me Lord to love you the way you love me.
And help me to love me the way you love me.
He knows my name
By Geoff Moore
I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in His hands
I have a Father
He calls me His own
He’ll never leave me
No matter where I go
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And hears me when I call
Thursday, January 8, 2009
ah the future~!
These days I've been working hard on my portfolio and just overall anxious about finding the right job. It's been a few weeks since graduation and I got to say, I knew I was going to be stressed, but I didn't know it would affect me this much...
I know that I need to have faith that He will provide, since He always has, but there's something in me that just keeps questioning and imagining the worst case scenario.
I think when you want something so bad--in my case, finally becoming financially independent and well, becoming an adult--it's scary to imagine it not happening anytime soon. I don't know why I think so negatively or why I tend to have such low confidence because I know I can do the work. I know I have what it takes to work professionally...but there's something inside of me that just pulls me down and says I can't. I guess it's just hard to imagine something I've always wanted for the longest time...
And now, I'm close to it. So close but feels so far. And that's what scares me. It's so close I can taste it, but having absolutely no control over where I'll end up takes a toll on me I guess...
Job hunting is one thing...a part of a bigger thought. Growing up. Being responsible. Managing money!!!! Now, that's something I'm definitely afraid of. It's all a part of growing up but I just feel overwhelmed I guess.
Questions run through my head all night. Questions like...Will I be able to stay here in New York for the next few years as I desire? Or Will I even find a job within the next 90 days so I don't violate my status here in the US? Will I make enough to continue living here in nyc without the help of my parents? (Probably not) So if not, where could I go? Will I ever meet anyone in the next few years? (Doubtful but still hopeful...)
I don't know what I would do without God. Honestly, how can someone be sane without having someone stable to lean on when nothing in life is stable. When nothing is secure or within your control. Voice of truth is a great song. This one's for me :)
Oh,what I would do to have
the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand
But the waves are calling out my name
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win,
you'll never win."
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand
But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
But the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says do not be afraid
And the voice of truth says this is for my glory
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are
I know that I need to have faith that He will provide, since He always has, but there's something in me that just keeps questioning and imagining the worst case scenario.
I think when you want something so bad--in my case, finally becoming financially independent and well, becoming an adult--it's scary to imagine it not happening anytime soon. I don't know why I think so negatively or why I tend to have such low confidence because I know I can do the work. I know I have what it takes to work professionally...but there's something inside of me that just pulls me down and says I can't. I guess it's just hard to imagine something I've always wanted for the longest time...
And now, I'm close to it. So close but feels so far. And that's what scares me. It's so close I can taste it, but having absolutely no control over where I'll end up takes a toll on me I guess...
Job hunting is one thing...a part of a bigger thought. Growing up. Being responsible. Managing money!!!! Now, that's something I'm definitely afraid of. It's all a part of growing up but I just feel overwhelmed I guess.
Questions run through my head all night. Questions like...Will I be able to stay here in New York for the next few years as I desire? Or Will I even find a job within the next 90 days so I don't violate my status here in the US? Will I make enough to continue living here in nyc without the help of my parents? (Probably not) So if not, where could I go? Will I ever meet anyone in the next few years? (Doubtful but still hopeful...)
I don't know what I would do without God. Honestly, how can someone be sane without having someone stable to lean on when nothing in life is stable. When nothing is secure or within your control. Voice of truth is a great song. This one's for me :)
Oh,what I would do to have
the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand
But the waves are calling out my name
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win,
you'll never win."
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand
But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
But the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says do not be afraid
And the voice of truth says this is for my glory
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are
Sunday, January 4, 2009
2009.
Already 2009.
Geez. Time really flies.
As millions of others out there probably proclaimed as their new years resolution, I think I too may start blogging again this year...even if it's for me to look at years from now...
Went to listen to Tim Keller today at Redeemer and he spoke about marriage. I have SO many thoughts and reflections but since I have way too much to do tonight (working on my portfolio), I will briefly share my afterthoughts and how it affects me at the moment...I will sum up his sermon another day.
Today's thought: God is love.
He consistently shows me He loves me and not just me but those I love and every single human being on this earth. Everything I have gone through is more than worth it because I know that I have grown from it and I am that much closer to being the person He so longed and continues to long for me to be.
Lord, my prayer is this. May I be able to see you more, know you more, love you much more and truly make you my first love. May you seamlessly heal me and may I fall in love with you all over again, but this time, in a truer and sacrificially whole-hearted way.
And to a special person who was the biggest part of my life for 5 years, who butted heads with me in numerous ways, who broke my heart to pieces at countless times, who consumes my mind more often than any other person ever has, it is because of this relationship God had planned between you and I, that I am who I am today...
You have hurt me more than I could ever imagine, yes, but you have sharpened me immensely. And you have helped me to build character. I have learned new depths of compassion, love, and truth through knowing you, fighting with you, loving you. Just as iron sharpens iron (as said in proverbs), you, my friend, have truly sharpened me.
So thank you for being you. And thank you Lord for...well for everything. You are simply amazing. I love you.
Geez. Time really flies.
As millions of others out there probably proclaimed as their new years resolution, I think I too may start blogging again this year...even if it's for me to look at years from now...
Went to listen to Tim Keller today at Redeemer and he spoke about marriage. I have SO many thoughts and reflections but since I have way too much to do tonight (working on my portfolio), I will briefly share my afterthoughts and how it affects me at the moment...I will sum up his sermon another day.
Today's thought: God is love.
He consistently shows me He loves me and not just me but those I love and every single human being on this earth. Everything I have gone through is more than worth it because I know that I have grown from it and I am that much closer to being the person He so longed and continues to long for me to be.
Lord, my prayer is this. May I be able to see you more, know you more, love you much more and truly make you my first love. May you seamlessly heal me and may I fall in love with you all over again, but this time, in a truer and sacrificially whole-hearted way.
And to a special person who was the biggest part of my life for 5 years, who butted heads with me in numerous ways, who broke my heart to pieces at countless times, who consumes my mind more often than any other person ever has, it is because of this relationship God had planned between you and I, that I am who I am today...
You have hurt me more than I could ever imagine, yes, but you have sharpened me immensely. And you have helped me to build character. I have learned new depths of compassion, love, and truth through knowing you, fighting with you, loving you. Just as iron sharpens iron (as said in proverbs), you, my friend, have truly sharpened me.
So thank you for being you. And thank you Lord for...well for everything. You are simply amazing. I love you.
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